Thursday, May 27, 2010

Avoiding

I have been avoiding blogging recently because I am frustrated. I have held off sharing this frustration with my blogging buddies, but I just can't anymore. To be honest, I am p@ss$d!

We have been waiting in the TA (Travel Approval) line now for just over one month. We were initially told to expect to receive our Travel Approval within about 2 - 4 weeks. Well, those dates have come and gone and we are still seeing no change in sight. What makes it worse is that people who have been waiting less time for their TAs have actually received them already. So, what is the deal? I have no friggin clue. We are not told one darned thing from the agency. Nobody seems to know why our TAs are taking so long.

What I loved about the Chinese NSN (non-special needs) process (we went that route in 2006) was that your dossier went over to China and received its LID (log-in-date). Nobody got pushed ahead of you in line. Nobody got any special treatment, each dossier was treated the same. You waited in line until it was your time. The system seemed fair.

Now we are part of the SN (special needs) system and it just seems like such a hodge-podge of things. There is no rhyme or reason that entire agencies receive TAs (travel approvals) long before other agencies. I do realize that there are special circumstances where people are rushed through because of the child's medical emergency and again other times where curcumstances make it so that some people must wait longer for their TA (paperwork expiring is one example). But overall, it just seems like once you receive your Article 5, your paperwork should then be put into a pile and given TA (travel approval) in that order. Allowing entire agencies to jump ahead of other people and agencies if extremely frustrating and... well... just not fair (yes, I am saying this because I am in the middle of this mess right now). It just seems that an organization (country) where they have been so good about making and keeping one aspect of the program (NSN) so fair for people, that they have not continued that same fairness for this program (SN).

Throughout this process we have been diligent. As soon as we received a piece of paper or packet to sign, we did and sent it off immediately to start the next step. We made sure that there was nothing we did that delayed our process at all. We made sure to be very diligent and aggressive in moving our paperwork right along. The delays that we are seeing nothing have nothing to do with anything we did.

Over at an adoption website I visit frequently, they have a list called the Steps to TA Chart. Adoptive parents ask to be placed on this list after they receive their LOA (Letter of approval). The list is very long with many entries from all over the United States. I have been on this list since March 1, the day we received our LOA. We are now at the very top of this list, having waited longer than anyone else on it to receive our TA.

What makes this wait even worse is that we had planned all along to have my father-in-law accompany us to China. But, now that is highly unlikely. I am not going to go into the specifics, but what determines when you travel is the CA (Consulate Appointment). As of today, all of the CAs are booked through June 21 are gone, and the weeks after through the first week of July are also filling very quickly. Unfortunately, my fahter-in-law needs to be back in the states by the beginning of July, so unless we get our TA NOW, he will likely not be able to travel with us. Which just stinks... he even has his visa, he is ready to go!

Add to that the fact that I am a teacher and the summer is the only time of year that I get off from work, so the one-on-one time with my baby is just slipping through my fingers. I am frustrated, p@ss$d off, angry, and absolutely sad that my baby is sitting over in China without a forever family, and we have no answers as to why we cannot go get her yet. I go to bed every night in tears. Right now I hate this process and will not recommend it to anyone. I know that some of these feelings will subside as time passes, but I am in the thick of it right now, this is just the way I feel.

Baby Butterfly, we will get there, and it is not our fault that it is taking so long. I am so sorry.

6 comments:

The Milfords said...

*sigh*

I have been praying for you. And me. And the rest of us who are still waiting in this ridiculous line for our piece of permission.

It is not fair. Not one single thing in this process has seemed fair. There are no traditional line. No concept of "next". No way to even guess when things will happen. It stinks. It really really stinks.

I'm still up for that drink we talked about. I think it will only take me half a day to get there. And that's if there are no cops on the road. :)

Either way, let's count on celebrating in China together, okay?

Praying for you!

Briana's Mom said...

I'm so, so sorry. It really isn't fair. It is so hard when the C2A2 won't give any answers. You are just in limbo and that just stinks. I hope that it will magically appear in the next few days. Praying for you.

Jinji's parents said...

Hang in there!

Collene kennedy said...

It will happen and it will all work out in a way that will make sense after the fact. I say this having just returned less than a week ago with our second child.

And frankly, if life were fair, men would have varicose veins!

Collene

Coco said...

Bailey, I'm so sorry you are having to deal with all this cr_p! It isn't fair at all! As hard as it is to believe right now God does have a plan. He has reasons we can't see now for the delay so try not to worry about the details and trust that He IS in control. (whew, that was one long run-on!) Hang in there - I'm thinking about you guys....

Coco

Dori's Mommy (Diana) said...

I hope this post just makes it all happen and you get over there SOON!